On Monday some dear friends had their first child. She is beautiful, as all babies are to me.
She is entirely ‘normal’ in the sense that she didn’t come with any sort of complications related to disability. I was completely happy for and with them, for lots of reasons.
That isn’t always the case.
I never wish for a disability on a child, of course. But when a child is born into a family without any of the complications we experience, I sometimes hear a voice inside my own head whispering, “Happy for them, but I wish I didn’t have these extra things to deal with.”
But for this day, God silenced that voice.
There are moments we need to fight for joy in our family, especially when dealing with things that cause Paul pain like his seizure disorder we’re trying to figure out.
But I realized as I left the hospital Monday night that I had been completely free to enjoy this new dad and new mom and new baby – entirely happy for them. My prayers with them had been unencumbered by any heaviness on my heart. God gave that experience to me.
That’s a gift.
I expect I’ll need to fight that voice in my own head again. But moments of pure enjoyment at another’s happy circumstance are very sweet. And I thank God for those moments.