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We’re still trying to figure out Paul’s ‘episodes’ that look like seizures but aren’t.  On Tuesday he had an MRI.

These visits never go quite according to plan.  We had about a 90 minute delay to get a question answered before they could proceed.  And his primary nurse just wasn’t as skilled as she seemed to think she was.

In other words, lots of room for a grumbling heart.

In the middle of our waiting, Dianne mentioned a devotional she had heard based on Charles Spurgeon’s Morning and Evening that had encouraged her. So I pulled out my phone and looked it up.   Tuesday’s devotional was on Psalm 84:7 and included this paragraph:

Those with anxious spirits trouble themselves about the future. “Oh!” they say, “we seem to go from affliction to affliction.” Very true, O you of little faith; but don’t forget that you also go from strength to strength. You will never find a bundle of affliction that doesn’t have God’s sufficient grace at the very center.

The desire to fight my sin was re-engaged. And gratitude to God for his Word and for a faithful wife commenced.

The stresses of life, the interruptions, the disappointments, the conflicts, the physical ailments, the losses – all of these may well be the very lens through which we see the meaning of God’s Word as never before.  Paradoxically, the pain of life may open us to the Word that becomes the pathway to joy.

John Piper, When I Don’t Desire God: How to Fight for Joy, p. 135.

“What father among you, if his son asks for a fish, will instead of a fish give him a serpent; or if he asks for an egg, will give him a scorpion? If you then, who are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will the heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” Luke 11:11-13

Years ago a mother of young children commented to Dianne, “you are so fortunate your son doesn’t beg for everything he sees at the store!” It was one of those statements that I’m sure that mother regrets saying.  I know I regret her saying it.

It was also kinda true. Paul only asks for things he knows; he isn’t enticed by advertisements, store displays or fliers.   And that isn’t all bad.

But sometimes it would be nice if he could ask for and anticipate receiving a gift from his family.

We include Paul in everything we can in our family, even things we probably shouldn’t for the sake of other people.  Opening presents is one of those things we enjoy doing together.  But Paul literally doesn’t ask for anything he doesn’t already have.  And of the things he has, he really only asks for a small subset of those things.

So, every year every member of the family, including extended family, has to think especially hard about Paul.  And we have to be prepared that the gifts he receives may not ever be appreciated or used.  Actually that’s a good thing:  freely we love our Paul and want to give him good gifts.  His response shouldn’t (and doesn’t) change that.

I know, of course, that he is given the daily gifts of a loving family, inclusive church, and access to health care – all of which make him a very rich young man.

But I take even greater comfort that God knows what Paul really needs – and will enjoy – even when I have no clue.

We had a little snow fall in the Twin Cities on Saturday – more than foot as a I write this.

No surprise to God; he brought it:

Elihu speaking to Job: God thunders wondrously with his voice; he does great things that we cannot comprehend. For to the snow he says, ‘Fall on the earth,’ likewise to the downpour, his mighty downpour (Job 37:5-6).

Let us remember the awesome power and glory of God, infinitely greater than any wind or snow or anything else he has created.  And we should celebrate how remarkable it is that he remembers we are dust, eager to show us compassion (Psalm 103:13-14).

[Addition on Saturday morning: if the video link below isn’t working, you can access it through this page.]

Pastor John on the power of the gospel of Jesus Christ, including the story of the moment he faced prostate cancer.

There is so much that is quotable in those 6+ minutes:

“He will give you what you need.”

“To that God be glory, forever and ever.”

“Don’t try to be strong in your own strength.  It will not be there when you need it.”

Amen, Pastor John!

As I write this on Thursday it feels like I’m surrounded by hurt in so many people I know: a young man having surgery related to his disability; a young wife hospitalized for an unknown, painful ailment; children going through rough spells physically and emotionally; families hurting and barely hanging on.

There is no room in these circumstances for a trite, cheerful response.

God’s word speaks into suffering.  It never fails to recognize the pain of this world, and the source of the answer:

Psalm 119:28 My soul melts away for sorrow;
strengthen me according to your word!
29 Put false ways far from me
and graciously teach me your law!
30 I have chosen the way of faithfulness;
I set your rules before me.
31 I cling to your testimonies, O Lord;
let me not be put to shame!
32 I will run in the way of your commandments
when you enlarge my heart!

There’s a little footnote attached to verse 32 which indicates that last part could also be read for you set my heart free. I love that thought!  I am especially comforted that it is God who does the work of enlarging hearts and setting hearts free.

I’m praying for an enlarged, free heart for you and for me today.

We reference prayer a lot here on this blog.  But what is it?  Are we just throwing our hopes up into the air and wishing?

From Wayne Grudem’s  Systematic Theology, p. 384:

Biblical faith is never a kind of wishful thinking or a vague hope that does not have any secure foundation to rest upon. It is rather trust in a person, God himself, based on the fact that we take him at his word and believe what he has said.  This trust or dependence on God, when it has an element of assurance or confidence, is genuine biblical faith.

David helps us think about what that confidence looks like:

For God alone, O my soul, wait in silence,
for my hope is from him.
He only is my rock and my salvation,
my fortress; I shall not be shaken.
On God rests my salvation and my glory;
my mighty rock, my refuge is God.

Trust in him at all times, O people;
pour out your heart before him;
God is a refuge for us.  Selah

Psalm 62:5-8

“Pour out your heart before him.”  What a great request!  Our helper and provider, the one in whom we can trust absolutely, welcomes our heart-felt cries from the depths of our hearts. And then he promises refuge.

Pray earnestly today, and hope in him alone.

I work with really smart guys who can read passages in Greek and Hebrew; they can be intimidating when they start discussing the bible!

But I’ve discovered that with a good study bible, combined with a desire to learn and a dependency on the Holy Spirit for help, even folks like us without those skills can enjoy more of the riches that God has provided to us in his word.

I have a couple of study bibles I use, with the ESV Study Bible being primary.  But my old MacArthur Study Bible still gets used as well.  And I pulled out both for this passage:

In that day the deaf shall hear the words of a book, and out of their gloom and darkness the eyes of the blind shall see (Isaiah 29:18).

The MacArthur Study Bible includes this helpful note on Isaiah 29:18:

The spiritual blindness of Israel will no longer exist. (emphasis mine)  Jesus gives the words an additional meaning, applying it to his ministry of physical healing for the deaf and blind. Macarther Study Bible: New American Standard Bible, p. 977

So, the ‘deaf’ and the ‘blind’ in this case is everyone of the people of Israel who do not know God for who he is.  Their spiritual blindness will be addressed by God himself!

Which indicate the physical healing Jesus provided is a sign pointing to something much greater – God addressing spiritual blindness.  As a sign, the physical healing is secondary and of lesser importance, though clearly a very good gift that Jesus is offering.  And we are told it is coming through God.

Both study bibles then point to Matthew 11:5 where Jesus uses his healing authority as evidence of something greater for John the Baptist, who has asked ‘are you the one’:

And Jesus answered them, “Go and tell John what you hear and see: the blind receive their sight and the lame walk, lepers are cleansed and the deaf hear, and the dead are raised up, and the poor have good news preached to them (Matthew 11:4-5).”

Again, the healing is a sign of something greater – the arrival of the Messiah who will “save his people from their sins (Matthew 1:21).”  Why would the Lord emphasize that to Joseph before Jesus was born except that it was of primary importance?

Even logically we know that physical healing is a lesser gift than spiritual healing because eventually everyone will die.  And after we die, we will face God who judges rightly.

Which brought to mind Matthew 5:29:

If your right eye causes you to sin, tear it out and throw it away. For it is better that you lose one of your members than that your whole body be thrown into hell.

“For it is better” for us to disable ourselves than to let sin rule our lives and lead us to eternal destruction.  This is another example of spiritual sight being a great deal more important than physical wholeness.

And we know that spiritual sight is not linked to physical sight:

. . . that the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you a spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him, having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints. . . (Ephesian 1:17-18)

This is the sight we should long for and ask for and pursue: Spirit-enlightened heart eyes!

So if you are struggling for a gift for someone this Christmas season, consider a good study bible.  And point people to the free resources of Desiring God where they can read, listen to or watch what Pastor John has to say and learn even more (he also can read Greek and Hebrew!).

On suffering:

Thank you to Justin Taylor for pointing to Matt Chandler’s blog posting marking  the one-year anniversary of his surgery for cancer.

Please take a moment to read it if you haven’t already.  I was enormously encouraged by it – I am His! – and deeply challenged to reflect on my own thoughts and behaviors (like praying).

On disability:

Congratulations to Joni & Friends for winning a Silver Telly Award for their production of When Disability Hits Home.

Chuck Colson and R.C. Sproul are prominently featured as the grandparents of children with disabilities.  One of my favorite men, even after having spent a fair amount of time with me, understood a great deal more about the impact of disability on a family after watching that production.

May God use this award to bring even more people into an understanding of God’s sovereign goodness in disability!

From The Imitation of Christ by Thomas à Kempis, Doubleday Dell Publishing Group, New York, 1989, pp. 172-3.

Originally written around 1427:

My son, says our Lord. . . Continue therefore as you are doing.  Labor busily and faithfully in My vineyard and I will shortly be your reward. Write, read, sing, mourn, be quiet and pray, and suffer adversity gladly, for the kingdom of heaven is worth more than all of these things, and is much greater than they.  Peace that is known to Me will come one day, and that will not be a day of this life, but a day everlasting with infinite clarity, steadfast peace, and secure rest without end. And then you will not say: Who is to deliver me from the body of this death; nor will you need to cry: Woe to me that my coming to the kingdom of heaven is thus prolonged, for death will then be destroyed, and health of body and soul will be without end, insomuch that there will be no manner of restlessness, but blessed joy and sweetest and most fair company.

Oh, if you saw the everlasting crowns of My saints in heaven, if you saw in how great joy and glory they are who sometimes seemed to be despised in the world, you would soon humble yourself low to the ground, and you would rather to be subject to all men than to have authority over one person. You would not desire to have happiness and pleasure in this world, but rather to bear with tribulation and pain, and you would account it a great gain to be considered as nothing among the people.  Oh, if these things tasted sweet to you and deeply pierced your heart, you would not dare once to complain of any manner of trouble that should befall you. Are not all painful things and grievous labors gladly to be endured for joy everlasting? Yes, truly. It is no little thing to win or lose the kingdom of heaven.

Lift up your face, therefore, to heaven, and behold how I and all My saints there with Me had great struggle and conflict in this world, yet now they rejoice with Me and are comforted in Me and are sure to abide in Me and to dwell with Me in the kingdom of My Father without end.